2008 Darwin Award Winner

Zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt ( Paderborn, Germany) fed his constipated elephant 22 doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries, figs and prunes before the plugged-up pachyderm finally got relief.

Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive oil enema (the poor man deserves some kind of award just attempting this ) when the relieved beast unloaded.

The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked Mr. Riesfeldtto the ground where he struck his head on a rock as the elephant continued to evacuate 200 pounds of dung on top of him

Car Pool

Today was my first day in a car pool.

Gas at over $1.25 per litre finally forced it upon us.

Four of us meet just off Guelph Line in Burlington and then in one car join the masses plodding off to Mississauga on the QEW.

We meet by 7:20 each morning & if anyone is late they have to buy coffee for the group. If more than one is late - the last arriving is on the hook. Seems fair but I may have a change of heart the first time there is an accident on the skyway:)

High Tech

I'm pretty proud of myself this week.

I wanted to get a small CD player to have with me on midnights next week. Looking around Canadian Tire I found something for about $50.

Right next to it was a MP3 player on sale for $30.

The kid sales guy assured me it was an excellent buy - so I took the plunge & purchased it.

Then I had to figure out not only how to work the thing but also how to download music to it.

I have now downloaded Lime Wire & Java to my laptop & have successfully downloaded a couple of songs to the MP3 player.

Yeah me !!

Back at Work

When I returned to my office Tuesday morning after 2 weeks away all 6 of my co-workers were sitting around looking like a bunch of school kids whose teacher had left the classroom.

Nothing looked out of place at my desk which surprised me because the usual prank (started by me) when someone is away is to turn everything on their desk upside down.

I quickly discovered my "friends" had spent a lot of the previous 2 weeks thinking of things to do to me that wouldn't be immediately obvious:

• May was missing from my desk calendar
• May was scotch taped to April on the wall calendar
• my work shoe laces are completely in knots
• my mouse pad was hidden
• the release button on my phone was taped down so that when I picked up the reciever there was no dial tone
• there was white guck all over the inside of the phone reciever
• my mouse was hidden in my work shoes
• the loading station for my laptop was taped up so that the laptop would not fit into it
• the internet cable was pulled slightly out of its socket
• the buttons on the phone (message, conference call, call forward etc) were changed around
• my lab coat now has one sleeve and one pocket sewed shut

They tell me I have yet to find all the things they did but at this point I think they are jsut pulling my chain.

Day 6

Nicer day - mid 70's & sunny
Went out to Lake Mead in the AM - we got stuck in a major traffic jam on the way. As luck would have it we were right next to a casino so we pulled in ate lunch & and played some slots until the police opened the road.
Lake Mead National Park is quite nice - lots of scenic overlooks.
A first for all three of us - a helicopter ride!!
Just a couple of minutes over Lake Mead but it was a neat experience - we all agreed we should have taken the longer (and more expensive) option.
The Hover Dam was very busy with traffic so we didn't hang around long.
Went to the MGM for dinner but it was very busy & all the restaurants we found were outrageously expensive so we crossed over to the Tropicana and enjoyed their buffet.
Mrv enjoyed their slots as well - she came home with a tidy profit.
Aunt Barb - not so good : )

Day Five

Cold & windy today (low 60's)
Started the day in shorts - went home & changed to jeans & sweatshirt after lunch.
Toured the Venetian in the morning - just love all the shops along the canal.
After lunch we found an antique place & wandered around there for quite awhile.
Late afternoon we went out to the South Point Casino had a nice steak dinner then went to a show that opened with Paul Revere & the Raiders followed by Bill Medley (half the Righteous Brothers).
Great show!!
Brought back a lot of memories.
Makes one feel a bit on the elderly side though when you find out how old these guys are.
Paul Revere is 70 and Bill Medley is 68!!
I wonder if 40 years ago they thought they would still be performing in 2008??
I wonder if the groups that are popular today will be playing in casino show rooms in 2050??

Day 4

About 75 & windy today.
Spent the morning wandering through the Planet Hollywood & the Paris Hotels.
Supper at the Olive Garden - something we try to do whenever we are in the US
Went to the Steve Wyrick Magic Show - wow!!
Some big stunts - helicopters & planes appearing on stage & a motercycle disappearing and then re- appearing behind us.
But its the little slight of hand things that amaze me - he took one of mrv's diamond rings & put it in a wine glass with 2 rings donated by 2 other audience members. Right there in the aisle beside us he stirred the rings with a chop stick and suddenly the 3 rings where interlocked. Mrv & the other ladies got to hold the rings & verifiy they were indeed linked. The he put them back in the wine glass & made them separate - all not more than 4 feelt from where I sat.
Amazing !!